Good morning and happy Saturday! ☕

Hope you're crushing this weekend. While you've been recharging (or binge-watching whatever's hot on Netflix), the startup world decided to drop some absolute bombs. We've got robotaxis raising $16 billion, Elon merging his empire into space, and Anthropic basically saying "your $350 billion valuation? Hold my beer."

Grab your coffee. Let's dive into the chaos.

⏱️ Read time: 5 minutes

🚗 Waymo raises $16B at $126B valuation — Robotaxis are going global (Tokyo, London, 20+ cities)

🚀 SpaceX acquires xAI for $1.25T — Data centers in space aren't science fiction anymore

🤖 Anthropic employee tender at $350B valuation — AI unicorns are now AI decacorns

💸 ElevenLabs raises $500M at $11B — AI voice tech is officially a mega-category

⚖️ Forbes 30 Under 30 fintech CEO charged with fraud — Another "visionary founder" gets handcuffs

What happened: Waymo just closed a $16 billion funding round at a $126 billion valuation—making it one of the most valuable private companies on the planet. They're using the cash to expand to 20+ cities, including their first international launches in Tokyo and London.

The numbers:

Alberto's take: Waymo just became the autonomous vehicle winner by default. Tesla still hasn't launched commercial robotaxis. Cruise imploded. Zoox is stuck in development hell. Waymo is the only one actually operating at scale in multiple cities, and now they have $16 billion to go global before anyone else figures it out.

Here's the play: Alphabet looked at the competitive landscape, realized Waymo was the only game in town, and wrote a check so big that no competitor can catch up. If you can't beat them with technology, beat them with capital. And $16 billion buys a lot of runway.

The risk? Robotaxi economics still aren't proven at scale. Waymo has $350M in annual revenue but is burning billions. If they can't hit unit economics before the money runs out, this becomes the most expensive science experiment in history.

The simple version: Waymo raised more money than God, is expanding to 20+ cities including Tokyo and London, and is betting that "first mover with infinite capital" beats "better technology later." They're probably right.

What happened: SpaceX officially acquired xAI this week, creating a $1.25 trillion combined entity—the most valuable private company in the world. Elon's pitch? Space-based data centers powered by solar panels and cooled by the vacuum of space.

The details:

Alberto's take: This isn't a merger. It's Elon building a vertical monopoly that spans rockets, satellites, AI, social media, and eventually space-based compute. It's either the smartest integration play in tech history or the most catastrophic case of overextension we've ever seen. Probably both.

Here's what nobody's saying: Elon just made xAI's burn problem SpaceX's problem. xAI is torching $1 billion a month with no path to profitability. SpaceX is profitable and generates $8 billion annually. The merger turns SpaceX into xAI's piggy bank while xAI gives SpaceX an AI narrative for the IPO.

Brilliant? Maybe. Reckless? Definitely.

The simple version: Elon merged his rocket company with his AI company, said he's building data centers in space, and created a $1.25 trillion entity that's either going to the moon or crashing into it. Place your bets.

What happened: Anthropic is preparing an employee tender offer at a valuation of at least $350 billion, alongside a funding round that could raise more than $20 billion.

The details:

Alberto's take: Anthropic went from $40B (November 2024) to $183B (September 2025) to $350B (February 2026) in 15 months. That's not growth—that's speculation on steroids.

Here's the uncomfortable truth: these valuations are based on the assumption that AI models will generate trillions in revenue. If that happens, $350B is cheap. If it doesn't, everyone holding these bags is going to get crushed.

But here's why I'm not dismissing it: Anthropic's Claude is legitimately good. Enterprises are paying for it. The product works. The question isn't whether Anthropic is real—it's whether $350 billion is justified for a company that's still burning billions with uncertain long-term economics.

The simple version: Anthropic is now worth more than Disney, Nike, and Starbucks combined. It's either the future of AI or the biggest bubble in tech history. We'll know which one in about 18 months.

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See you on the other side.

What happened: ElevenLabs, the AI voice and speech technology company, raised a $500 million Series D at an $11 billion valuation. Sequoia led, a16z and ICONIQ participated. Total funding: $781 million.

Why it matters: AI voice isn't a feature anymore—it's a category. ElevenLabs is powering voice generation for everything from audiobooks to video games to customer service bots. The technology is so good that it's becoming impossible to tell AI-generated voices from real humans.

The play: Voice is the next frontier after text and images. ElevenLabs is positioning itself as the picks-and-shovels provider for anyone building voice-enabled AI products.

The simple version: AI voice tech is now worth $11 billion because we're entering a world where every app, game, and service will have realistic voice. ElevenLabs is building the infrastructure for that future.

What happened: The CEO of fintech startup Kalder has been charged with federal fraud. Prosecutors allege he raised millions using inflated revenue claims, misleading customer lists, and forged documents.

Why it matters: This is becoming a pattern. Forbes 30 Under 30 is starting to look less like a list of future leaders and more like a pipeline to federal court.

The lesson: Hype doesn't build companies. Revenue does. And if you're faking the numbers to raise money, you're not a visionary—you're a criminal.

The simple version: Another "promising young founder" turned out to be a fraud. Shocked? Neither are we.

🚗 Waymo: $16B at $126B valuation (Alphabet, Sequoia, a16z, DST, Dragoneer)

🤖 Day AI: $20M Series A (Sequoia-led, AI-powered CRM for deal risk)

⚡ Plug: $20M Series A (Lightspeed-led, EV wholesale/retail marketplace)

🎮 Ares Interactive: $70M Series A (General Catalyst-led, free-to-play mobile games)

🎙️ ElevenLabs: $500M at $11B (Sequoia, a16z, ICONIQ)